I can get very frustrated with people who are being unreasonable or difficult in some other way, and I think of myself patient person when it comes to others. But there are just always those people who don’t know they are being annoying and keep getting on the nerves of others, those people who can’t explain why they are mad at you, and those people who think they need more attention from everyone. It must sound like I am a moody person and rant all the time, I promise you I am not (you can ask my friends)! So let’s get started with the tips for how to handle with difficult people.
- Try to keep your cool. It sounds so obvious but when you are in a situation when you’re really mad at someone or frustrated it is easy that you say whatever is on your mind, and that is not always the best thing to do. Try to count to ten (like they taught you in middle school) and think for yourself that what you want to say is the best way to say it or if it is even worth saying at all. By doing this you can avoid that whole situation is going to escalate.
- Some people are just really not worth your time. If you feel that you always have conflicts with the same person, you should ask yourself the question: is he/she ever going to change? Is he/she ever going to be convinced by my ideas? If not, try to keep a healthy distance. Sometimes it can be hard to do this because you have to either work with them, or you see them at school every day. But there is a difference between working with each other and hanging out with one another. If you don’t have to, don’t do it. Remember, fly like an eagle. You can’t fly like an eagle if you hang out with turkeys.
- Instead of being reactive, try to be proactive. With this I mean that you should concentrate your energy on solving problems. This sometimes, actually most of the times, means that you need to consider to compromise.
- Try to avoid conflict. This is something I always try to do. And sometimes it means going against what the other people are doing. I hate it when people are having discussions and just can’t come with a compromise. Instead of trying to get my opinion in there, I just don’t participate and keep myself out of it. It is something you have to learn to do, but if you think about it you are way better off. No unnecessary stress about something stupid. It saves you time, energy and grief.
- What caused the conflict? Sometimes a person’s behavior is a reaction to something you did or said. Ask yourself the question if maybe you did something wrong. It is often easy to blame others, but sometimes it’s us and we have to own up to that.
I am sure we all find ourselves in some situation when we have to deal with difficult people. Just remember these tips and try to spare yourself the conflict and focus your energy on positive things!